i give up being the (wrong) sister to the "i'm always right" brother.

i'm amazed at mothers. i don't know how they do it. most of the times, i don't get them...how they're able to function, etc but a lot of the times i'm amazed at their restraint & gentleness.

gentleness is one of the fruit of the spirit which i struggle mightily with. i've been praying for gentleness for quite some time now (it's almost going to be a decade soon!) and i don't know if that'll ever happen. but i know all things are possible with God, so i have faith in THAT regard. however, being the sinful person I am, i highly doubt that i can really change! (oh the vicious circle of sinful human mind...)

for instance, i had to learn patience through dealing with piano students. yet i'm still impatient. i see a mother who admonishes her child but with gentleness and it's totally foreign to me. i don't know if i'd ever LEARN to be gentle? quite honestly, i think i'd be a horrible mother, fun at times but also screaming a lot of times. i don't know, it's all so hard.

it's all very daunting.

does this fall under faithfulness as well? faithful that all things will please god? will i be a pleasing mother?

wait a minute, i'm so FAR from being a mother, it's just not even worth considering, but i can't help but to consider. it's not that i WANT to be a mother - i'm just...AMAZED! sometimes...it's scary!

it's been awhile since i posted, and that means it's a 'fess up time.

this holiday season has been a very HUMBLING one (see the pix?) - i've been "stuffing" myself with many, MANY pieces of (humble) pie...

it's because of my Christ, i am able to forego my pride & ego and eat as MANY humble pies as possible!

so thanks lord Jesus for your unbelievable faith in me and giving me lots of...HUMBLE PIE!